


found the place to rest my head

by perfectlyrose



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Love Confessions, M/M, Nightmares, Pining Shiro (Voltron), Post-Season/Series 06
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-12 17:09:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19233505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perfectlyrose/pseuds/perfectlyrose
Summary: Shiro hears the change in Keith’s breathing a moment before his face scrunches up and his whole body tenses.Nightmare, he diagnoses in an instant. He hasn’t seen Keith have one yet and Keith hasn’t mentioned them even though he’s helped Shiro out of several already, endlessly patient and gentle.It’s just like Keith to try and hide something like this if he can, though. It explains at least part of the dark circles under his eyes.Shiro sits up as quickly as he can, shedding his blankets and swinging his feet over the side of the bunk. “Keith,” he whispers.On their way back to Earth, Shiro can't sleep. He lies awake and he thinks and he pines for the man sleeping just across the room.





	found the place to rest my head

**Author's Note:**

> a little thing for the anniversary of s6/The Black Paladins and the "I love you"

Shiro can’t sleep. 

The small sleeping cabin on the Black Lion is the perfect temperature and there’s just enough ambient light for him to see where he is without being too bright. Even the bunk is comfortable because, despite Shiro’s protests, Keith had insisted on taking the cot instead of the built-in bunk. He even has an extra blanket that Keith dug out from the boxes saved from the Castle.

Perfect conditions for sleep, really, or as perfect as they’re going to get drifting through deep space. They started back towards Earth a couple days ago and it’s been smooth sailing so far. Shiro’s never been more thankful for the boredom of space flight. Everyone could use a break and it seems the universe is giving them one, for once.

But he still can’t sleep. He feels like he’s just going to permanently exist in this state of exhaustion and overstimulation. Even in this dark room, even in the quiet, there’s too much going on for his mind to tune out. He squeezes his eyes shut, but it just intensifies the weight of the sheets, the soft scrape of them against his skin. Over the everpresent hum of the Black Lion he can just barely hear the soft cadence of Krolia’s voice in the cockpit, probably talking to the space wolf or whoever else is awake this shift.

Shiro changes positions, making a face when he tries to use his right arm to turn over before realizing it’s gone for the millionth time. He finally rolls over on his side, looking over at where the cot is set up on the other side of the room, barely three feet away.

Keith seems to be sleeping just fine, breath even and slow. He’s curled on his side, facing Shiro’s bed, back to the wall.

The steady sound of Keith’s breathing usually helps Shiro drift off, the few times they’ve ended up sleeping at the same time. It gives him something to focus on. Knowing he could so easily reach Keith if he needs to also calms something in his soul. He feels safe with Keith here.

He knows Keith feels the same to some extent. He’s seen the way Keith hesitates before leaving a room that Shiro’s in, noticed how his eyes always seek out Shiro first thing and the way his shoulders relax when he finds him safe and fine.

Shiro studies Keith’s face in the low light. The scar he received at Shiro’s hands stands out even now, glistening with the salve Krolia insisted he apply before bed. He lets himself trace the mark with his eyes now that there are no witnesses. Guilt burns its way up his throat and he yanks his gaze up to the little furrow between Keith’s brows, not even eased in sleep tonight, and the fall of his hair over his forehead.

He can’t believe he missed two years of Keith’s life in the blink of an eye. More if he factors in his time in the astral plane and the year he spent as a prisoner with Keith still back on Earth. Shiro has the clone’s memories and they mostly feel like his own but he also remembers the ache of missing Keith from inside of Black’s consciousness, straining to feel even the barest connection with him when he’d suddenly stopped piloting. 

He keeps missing time with Keith, so he’s once again found himself seeking out the changes he missed out on seeing happen in person. Keith’s shoulders are broader and he’s gained a couple inches but those are the things Shiro noticed immediately. The subtle changes, the way his face has filled in -- still all sharp angles juxtaposed with that soft mouth and wide eyes but… matured in a way Shiro can’t quite pinpoint. He carries himself differently now. There’s a confidence there that seems bone-deep instead of an act he puts on. He doesn’t act like he’s afraid to take up space now, at least not here in Black or around the team.

Shiro likes it, likes the changes time wrought on his best friend this time around. He’s long past denying that he finds Keith attractive, gave up on that before he ended up in the astral plane. He loves Keith, it’s that simple and that complicated. 

He bites his lip, feeling the pain zing through him more than he expected. He knows Keith loves him, knew even before his swords-edge confession, but Keith loves him like family. A brother, he said. So, Shiro mostly tries to shove down the warm and squirmy feelings Keith inspires, tries to ignore the sparks that Keith’s touch sends tumbling through his veins that are not solely from touch-starvation.

Shiro hears the change in Keith’s breathing a moment before his face scrunches up and his whole body tenses.  _ Nightmare _ , he diagnoses in an instant. He hasn’t seen Keith have one yet and Keith hasn’t mentioned them even though he’s helped Shiro out of several already, endlessly patient and gentle.

It’s just like Keith to try and hide something like this if he can, though. It explains at least part of the dark circles under his eyes.

Shiro sits up as quickly as he can, shedding his blankets and swinging his feet over the side of the bunk. “Keith,” he whispers.

Keith’s breath is harsh now and his face is twisting more with every second. He’s so tense that Shiro’s body aches in sympathy.

“Keith,” he says again, a little louder this time as he leans closer. “Keith, you’re safe. You’re in Black with me and your mom and the wolf and you’re safe.” If he can get Keith to settle without waking him, maybe he can still get more needed sleep.

A strangled whimper makes it past Keith’s lips and Shiro can’t stay across the room, not when Keith is hurting and trapped in his head, not when Shiro can maybe do something about it. He crosses the space between their beds in two steps and sinks to his knees by Keith’s cot.

“Keith, come on, baby.” The endearment slips from his lips without thought as his hand hovers over Keith’s shoulder, unsure if he should risk touch.

Another sound catches in Keith’s throat, pained and desperate. Shiro brings his hand down to Keith’s shoulder in an instant, the need to comfort outweighing any other consideration.

“Wake up, Keith. Come on, wake up for me.”

Keith lashes out with one hand as his eyes fly open, glazed over and unseeing. He lands a solid hit on Shiro’s chest as he sits up but Shiro doesn’t budge. “Hey, hey, it’s me,” he soothes, moving to catch Keith’s hand. “You’re safe.”

“Shiro?” Keith’s voice is a rasp and his eyes finally lock onto Shiro. His grip on Shiro’s hand is painful but Shiro barely notices.

“You were having a nightmare,” he says, rubbing his thumb over Keith’s knuckles. His grip eases slightly.

“Shit,” Keith whispers, squeezing his eyes closed. “Fuck, I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“Hadn’t fallen asleep yet,” Shiro assures him. “How are you feeling?”

Keith presses his lips into a thin line. “I’m fine.”

“Keith,” Shiro presses. “You can talk to me, if you’re not. You don’t have to be fine all the time.”

“I don’t…” he cuts off. “I don’t… you already have so much going on. I don’t want to….  _ Shiro _ .” His hand is shaking in Shiro’s now. His other one is fisted in his lap and he’s staring at it.

Keith’s always had a hard time finding the words he wants when strong emotions have him in their grasp. It’s almost comforting to see that this isn’t something that’s changed even as his heart hurts for his friend.

“Hey, you’re not going to burden me or whatever you’re thinking,” Shiro says, ducking his head to try and catch Keith’s eyes. “Let me be here for you, too, Keith. Please. I want to.”

_ I love you, too _ , he doesn’t say. He hopes Keith knows anyways. He’s not sure he can say the words and Keith not hear exactly how he means them, say them and not announce with every fiber of his being that he’s  _ in love _ with Keith.

Keith meets his eyes for what feels like an eternity before he just collapses forward against Shiro’s chest, hands moving to clutch at the back of Shiro’s t-shirt. His whole body is shaking now and Shiro wraps his arm around him in the best hug he can manage with his current limitations.

“I got you,” Shiro tells him, turning his face into Keith’s hair. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

Keith lets out a shuddering breath that seeps through Shiro’s shirt, warm and wet.

“I’m here,” Shiro repeats. He keeps disappearing on Keith but he’s here  _ now _ . Hopefully for forever, this time. “As long as you want me here, I’m here.”

Keith digs his fingers into Shiro’s shoulder blades. “Shiro…” he says, almost sounding lost, the dregs of his nightmare still holding on.

“I mean it,” Shiro says. “As long as you want. Forever. I’m here.”

It’s too much, too much, too much, and the only thing keeping Shiro from fleeing from his own pounding heart is Keith’s grip on him.

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Keith says. He nuzzles against Shiro’s chest, right above his heart. He has to be able to feel its rabbiting.

“Keith…” Shiro starts. He shouldn’t be the one feeling shaky when Keith had a nightmare, but he’s drowning in Keith’s embrace, in his scent and the way his breath is settling back to it’s normal steady rhythm. He’s overwhelmed by the love in this embrace and he has to make sure Keith  _ knows _ , assuming isn’t enough. “Keith, I know you already told me, but I’m here for you as many times as it takes, too.”

Keith sucks in a breath. “You remember. I wasn’t… I wasn’t sure how much…”

“All of it,” Shiro admits. “It’s all there.”

Keith’s forehead digs into Shiro’s sternum and Shiro drags his fingers up and down Keith’s spine.

“So, you remember the fight.” It’s not a question.

“Is that what your nightmare was about?”

Keith nods, fists his hand in Shiro’s shirt again. Shiro presses his palm to Keith’s lower back in apology for bringing it back up.

“It’s what a lot of mine are about too,” Shiro says.

They’re silent for a moment before Keith speaks again. He sounds cautious, even as he lays his heart bare. “I meant it, you know.”

Shiro stops breathing.

“I know I’m probably always going to just be like a brother to you or whatever,” Keith continues, unable to see the confusion paint itself across Shiro’s face, “but I had to tell you. I thought I was going to die and I needed you to know. But I don’t expect anything, I’m just so glad you’re alive and here and-”

“Keith,” Shiro interrupts, finally remembering how to breathe. “Keith.”

He seems to be reduced to a single word but it’s the most important one.

Keith pulls away enough to look Shiro in the eye again. His face is an open book, all steadfast love and adoration mixed with caution and hope.

Shiro finds more words. “I love you. I love you too, Keith.”

“Like…”

“Like I would really like to kiss you,” Shiro says before Keith can continue. “Like I am in love with you and have been for a while.”

“Shiro!” Keith’s eyes are wide and shimmering like there are tears collecting. A smile is stretching itself across his face. He’s beautiful. “You mean that?”

“With my whole heart,” Shiro assures him through a smile of his own. “Now, about that ki-”

Keith leans up and presses his mouth against Shiro’s before he can finish. He really can’t complain about it.

They end up curling up together in Shiro’s bunk, lips kiss-swollen and smiles still lingering on their faces. Keith falls back asleep quickly. Shiro follows quicker than he thought possible, lulled by Keith’s arms around him.

The nightmares leave them alone for the rest of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/LionessNapping) and [tumblr](http://perfectlyrose.tumblr.com)!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] found the place to rest my head by perfectlyrose](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21457141) by [taikodragon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/taikodragon/pseuds/taikodragon)




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